love is; caring
love is; support
love is; being there, no matter the circumstances..
love is; making time for others..
love is; a feeling..an undescibable one..
love is: felt world wide.
love is; knowing you are not alone..even in the darkest of times
love is; having hope something better is coming..
love is; having faith and knowing it is real
love is; a fairytale the world can be in. the world can feel.
love is; God
love is; what everyone looks for. what everyone waits for.
love is; friendship
love is; showing all this.. and more!
love maybe just a word..but to so many..its more..
lol just came randomly to me..wanted to share.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Thursday, January 28, 2010
yr ten..
omg. i feel so crappy atm.
dnt feel like anything. and i feel so tired..the pressure is on already. faa my mum was like stop msging and focus on ur work...
omg it pisses me off, now im not in the best mood. cant even smile. :/
she doesnt know how much pressure i put on myself to do well, not only for myself but more for my mum. beacuse she is always like..i dnt want anything from you or ur sister. jst to get good grades. and look. i try so frkn hard. its only the frkn first day of the bloody year and already. yea i know i have hw. geeze i brought it home didnt i! and yea. i will do it. in my own time. when im ready. when im in the mood.
why dont parents understand. or even try to see how we, the kids/students feel. yea we get it that they go to work blah blah that they have to do so much around the house and are so tired..who says school isnt tiring. we have hw for almost every subject we have.
our parents are not the only people who have expectations for us. i have expectations for myself. and yea sometimes im dissapointed and know i can do better. but i know the difference..i know what i can do. what i am capable of...freaking hell. this is a place where i can jst let it out. you frkn come to the screen i minimise it. i dnt want u to see. freak somethings in my life i like to keep to myself. away from you. you see its not frkn work.."get off the comp if ur not doing ur hw!"
freaking hell. i wna leave this house! maybe im being dramatic. but atm i dnt freaking care! i feel so emotional im even tearing up. what the hell is going on with me?!
im so tired of my moodyness lately! i really am..please help it stop. i want to be myself again..and i dnt remember being like this.. :(
dnt feel like anything. and i feel so tired..the pressure is on already. faa my mum was like stop msging and focus on ur work...
omg it pisses me off, now im not in the best mood. cant even smile. :/
she doesnt know how much pressure i put on myself to do well, not only for myself but more for my mum. beacuse she is always like..i dnt want anything from you or ur sister. jst to get good grades. and look. i try so frkn hard. its only the frkn first day of the bloody year and already. yea i know i have hw. geeze i brought it home didnt i! and yea. i will do it. in my own time. when im ready. when im in the mood.
why dont parents understand. or even try to see how we, the kids/students feel. yea we get it that they go to work blah blah that they have to do so much around the house and are so tired..who says school isnt tiring. we have hw for almost every subject we have.
our parents are not the only people who have expectations for us. i have expectations for myself. and yea sometimes im dissapointed and know i can do better. but i know the difference..i know what i can do. what i am capable of...freaking hell. this is a place where i can jst let it out. you frkn come to the screen i minimise it. i dnt want u to see. freak somethings in my life i like to keep to myself. away from you. you see its not frkn work.."get off the comp if ur not doing ur hw!"
freaking hell. i wna leave this house! maybe im being dramatic. but atm i dnt freaking care! i feel so emotional im even tearing up. what the hell is going on with me?!
im so tired of my moodyness lately! i really am..please help it stop. i want to be myself again..and i dnt remember being like this.. :(
Thursday, January 21, 2010
hey. long time no speak? lol.
anyways. i was in the shower, and started thinking.. this year is going to be so different!
its already nearing the end of jan and school is coming up. and already ive had filling in my teeth..gotta took after them now. and so many life style changes..
my mum wants my family, well mainly my dad sister and i to eat more healthy? like salads and no more junk food. starting the first of feb. other then being healthy and eating better, its saving money :) im actually looking forward to it, even though it may be difficult. i need to loose weight. :/
plus in winter? my good friend angelica and i are starting soccer, for st pats btown. wooo! haha. the registraition thingo is on the 30th jan? and 6th feb. were going to try out for that! pretty excited :)
and then. my mum wants to put me for tutions..for math, science and english. to get me ready for yr 11 and 12 and yr 10 too. like so i can get better grades and understand more and that.
see, already. jst by doing soccer and then tutions, that will cost a lot. like for soccer..the uniform. shoes and shin pads and other gear and stuff. but i guess its okay coz its good, and i need to be active in a sport. always wanted to play soccer for st pats.
so this yr. with soccer, tutions and a life style change. and school. im going to be so busy. im going to make sure i get my work done. have better itme management so i am able to do whatever i have to and still have time to train and practice and that, but of course still have fun.
i dnt wna waste time anymore. i wna get things sorted out. what im going to do in life..hopefully that is something im working towards. i know im only 14. so young but i want to have some idea of whats going to happen, what im going to study for and that..? :)
yaay. okay ima go now.. im going to go read ;)
anyways. i was in the shower, and started thinking.. this year is going to be so different!
its already nearing the end of jan and school is coming up. and already ive had filling in my teeth..gotta took after them now. and so many life style changes..
my mum wants my family, well mainly my dad sister and i to eat more healthy? like salads and no more junk food. starting the first of feb. other then being healthy and eating better, its saving money :) im actually looking forward to it, even though it may be difficult. i need to loose weight. :/
plus in winter? my good friend angelica and i are starting soccer, for st pats btown. wooo! haha. the registraition thingo is on the 30th jan? and 6th feb. were going to try out for that! pretty excited :)
and then. my mum wants to put me for tutions..for math, science and english. to get me ready for yr 11 and 12 and yr 10 too. like so i can get better grades and understand more and that.
see, already. jst by doing soccer and then tutions, that will cost a lot. like for soccer..the uniform. shoes and shin pads and other gear and stuff. but i guess its okay coz its good, and i need to be active in a sport. always wanted to play soccer for st pats.
so this yr. with soccer, tutions and a life style change. and school. im going to be so busy. im going to make sure i get my work done. have better itme management so i am able to do whatever i have to and still have time to train and practice and that, but of course still have fun.
i dnt wna waste time anymore. i wna get things sorted out. what im going to do in life..hopefully that is something im working towards. i know im only 14. so young but i want to have some idea of whats going to happen, what im going to study for and that..? :)
yaay. okay ima go now.. im going to go read ;)
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
SURPRISE! :D
lol so much to say about this surprise party...PLANNED BY VANESSAA! props to you, it was a huge success :D haha. thanks to you.
but i'll jst leave it at that. haha. one to remember <3
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
i dnt care i dnt care i dnt care
i dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt carei dnt care i dnt care i dnt care
shes speaking to me. well shouting coz when she talks all i say is above.. i dnt care. fucking hell. why would i care what she says.. ohh yea. she says.. spot the odd one out. :@ circle the difference. im such a wna be. im fat. i have so many pimples on my face. i think im all that
well freaking fuck off coz i dnt care and never will care about what you say. and just because i talk over you repeating i dnt care. doesnt mean i care. it means i dnt give a crap anymore about what you call me. or what you say anymore.
just go get a life and ruin someone elses day. life. i give up.
and I DONT CARE!! say what you want. that i dnt belong. that yeaa. i feel so good coz i fit in. that i try to. omg. why the hell would i care, your just a sterotype a nosy no it all who thinks everyone care or gives a crap about what you say. you smelly shit. well i dnt care and im tired of hearing what you have to say! :@ oohh yea. and then if anything ever happens to me. your always life 'karma' what the hell? karma for what? i dnt do anything to you so leave me alone!
thanks for listening, :)
shes speaking to me. well shouting coz when she talks all i say is above.. i dnt care. fucking hell. why would i care what she says.. ohh yea. she says.. spot the odd one out. :@ circle the difference. im such a wna be. im fat. i have so many pimples on my face. i think im all that
well freaking fuck off coz i dnt care and never will care about what you say. and just because i talk over you repeating i dnt care. doesnt mean i care. it means i dnt give a crap anymore about what you call me. or what you say anymore.
just go get a life and ruin someone elses day. life. i give up.
and I DONT CARE!! say what you want. that i dnt belong. that yeaa. i feel so good coz i fit in. that i try to. omg. why the hell would i care, your just a sterotype a nosy no it all who thinks everyone care or gives a crap about what you say. you smelly shit. well i dnt care and im tired of hearing what you have to say! :@ oohh yea. and then if anything ever happens to me. your always life 'karma' what the hell? karma for what? i dnt do anything to you so leave me alone!
thanks for listening, :)
feels so good!
it may sound selfish or something like that but i dnt care.
i think i deserve this feeling..
after so long. deandra's mean and cruel words and actions didnt really affect me but instead i showed i didnt care. at all. and i didnt really. and then i didnt walk away but i gave her what she wanted and she was gna cry :L
hahahaha. i feel so good coz for a change i wasnt the one who got hurt. although she did try hit me. i hate how she makes up lies. she lies in my face and i know shes lying and i tell my parents that shes lying but they dnt care. only let me get in trouble. but i dnt care anymore! im better. shes just childish and stupid and annoying and a big freaking lying bum face :)
i dnt want to be the victim anymore. so im gna do nothing. and it seems me doing nothing, and not caring. gets to her. haha coz i jst give up :)
im the bigger person. :p
i think i deserve this feeling..
after so long. deandra's mean and cruel words and actions didnt really affect me but instead i showed i didnt care. at all. and i didnt really. and then i didnt walk away but i gave her what she wanted and she was gna cry :L
hahahaha. i feel so good coz for a change i wasnt the one who got hurt. although she did try hit me. i hate how she makes up lies. she lies in my face and i know shes lying and i tell my parents that shes lying but they dnt care. only let me get in trouble. but i dnt care anymore! im better. shes just childish and stupid and annoying and a big freaking lying bum face :)
i dnt want to be the victim anymore. so im gna do nothing. and it seems me doing nothing, and not caring. gets to her. haha coz i jst give up :)
im the bigger person. :p
it pisses me off so much the way that people are so quick to judge!
im sorry blogspot. i have abandoned using it for a while. i didnt mean to. its just whenever im feeling really shitty, i dnt really get the chance to come on here and let it out --'
lately. i must admit. ive been moody. happy and normal one second. and the next. annoyed, upset and so pissed.
i really miss those days. i remember when i wasnt to emotional. and i was always wearing a smile. i always had a reason to.. now. not so much. there are so many things/people who do make me smile and cheer me up. but there are even more things. closer to home. literally. my so called family!
ahh. i wish.. i know im ungreatful and that. but i really do wish.. what my sister says was true. that i was adopted.. before everything was always normal and fine. but in the last yr. things have gotten worse? somehow idno how or even why. but it did. and my emotions just cant take it anymore. sometimes i dnt even know what to do. i pray. and hope. that everything will be alright. most of the time it is. but. omg! it pisses me off that anything and everything is balmed on me, sometimes for no reason at all!
ahh. i want to escape from here. and i cant wait to be 18! jst a few more years and more freedom..
im sorry blogspot. i have abandoned using it for a while. i didnt mean to. its just whenever im feeling really shitty, i dnt really get the chance to come on here and let it out --'
lately. i must admit. ive been moody. happy and normal one second. and the next. annoyed, upset and so pissed.
i really miss those days. i remember when i wasnt to emotional. and i was always wearing a smile. i always had a reason to.. now. not so much. there are so many things/people who do make me smile and cheer me up. but there are even more things. closer to home. literally. my so called family!
ahh. i wish.. i know im ungreatful and that. but i really do wish.. what my sister says was true. that i was adopted.. before everything was always normal and fine. but in the last yr. things have gotten worse? somehow idno how or even why. but it did. and my emotions just cant take it anymore. sometimes i dnt even know what to do. i pray. and hope. that everything will be alright. most of the time it is. but. omg! it pisses me off that anything and everything is balmed on me, sometimes for no reason at all!
ahh. i want to escape from here. and i cant wait to be 18! jst a few more years and more freedom..
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