i wna go camping..like real camping in the outdoors :)
like the time i went to colo river? with my cousins on their church camping trip..it rained at night but omg i had heaps of fun, staying up late with my cousins and the kids from church, my awsome primary priest always like to go camping and stuff, for fun, with nature :) hahaha. and omg, noel and i played cheat with a few other kids we knew and we both laughed so hard :L hahaha funniest night ever, unforgatable, noel lost his voice the next day from laughing so hard, and we full roasted mashmellows on the bon fire..yes we had a real bon fire in a bin and everything. fire wood. hahaha and my other cousin, dexter had this huge stick..and my sock got wet as it was raining so he put my sock on the bonfire and omg :L i was like dexter take it off, its burning! and i was right, it burnt a hole in my sock. aww i loved that weekend, went for walks in the bush, played games, talked, went swimming in the river..it was a great few nights, with my cousins, uncle and anuty and a few people from their parish :) one camping trip i wont forget..i wna go again. camping like that! :) i really do. even though after when u get home ur clothes smell like burning stuff from the fire :L hahaha the smell kinda sticks --'
*sigh i sure do love those good memories :)

lol im annoyed..with deandra i get annoyed so easily.
hahaha. this post will be of no use but im gna jst randomly say what im thinking, and even though i always have heaps to say..im not gna expand on it yeaa? :L

i dnt like people who are quick to judge..or sterotype :/ (sometimes i do this..hence why i dnt like myself when i do, or i dnt mean to do this..?)

thats about it. lol see no point :L
anyways. ima go make a list of stuff i want from americaaa..my mums going next week..so soon :/ lol im hoping to get a new pair of chucks :) woo! the last pair i got were in 07! and i do really like chucks..more hi-cut cause i have wide feet and low-cut show how big my feet really are--' hahaha. i dnt think they suite me as well as hi-cut? :L hahaha yeaa jst wanted to share.
i should also do some shakespeare..wasted today on the couch watching tv --' hahaha.
anyways. have a lovely night ;)
<3

as time gets closer and closer.. i have no idea of what im going to do if i dnt come up with the money soon for my camera D: im so scared of getting caught its not even funny. *sigh it wouldnt have been as bad if i bought the camera myself, but no one understands the value of the camera..its not like im making a big deal over nothing D: but still, im sorry.

holidays..

lol so this is the last week right..so idno when im gna have time to finish reading julius caesar --' or other hw i know i need to do..ohh craap :/

Monday- vianca's house to watch OTH :)
Tuesday- hopefully kick ass with everyone... :L hahaha. (that sounds awsome, as if were gna beat someone..no no, just the movie :L) and training :)
Wednesday- nothing (maybe getting a trim..finally)
Thursday- city/dentist D:
Friday- maybe my house?
Saturday- not too sure..i guess homework :/
Sunday- soccer game with angel again :)

so hoping that im not paying extra for this..im on my phone and been going on alot of other sites on my phone outta bordem --' ahh. Sure hope this stops. Im in bed, well my couch and watching tv..south park coz theres nothing better on i might even watch the game plan :) and freaking theres a fly thats buzzing around annoying me --'
hahaha south park is pretty funny :L hahaha. Anyways..the point of this is that these holidays so far have jst been me at home, trying to think of better stuff to do, and what my friends r doing that i could be doing but arent? :/
im kinda lookin forward to the trip we might be going on at the end of the yr, at least i'll be doing something right? :) better than dying of bordem..but then my mum said that we might not even go anymore coz freaking hell they might not be able to get leave from work..the same reason were not going to melbourne next wk. My mum doesnt let us go anywhere for some reason but then she doesnt take us anywhere coz she's always working and its not fair k:(

ps..i cant see what im writing anymore coz it wont let me scroll down --' but yeaa..jst wen i was getting more excited to go overseas. I wna go to america and canada with my mum next moth! I really do --' but i know i wont be able to..im hungry. I wna go on an adventure, i saw pics of my friend jessica, who now lives in hong kong. She moved with her fam i think coz of her dads job? But even thou shed miss australia so much but still, hong kong. A new country, new place to explore it would be so much fun. Even learning to go to school there..


Okay..this isnt funny anymore..maybe i'll watch the game plan.. :)
night all
<3

im excited now..in a way.
jst talked to my aunty who i miss so dearly, to wish her happy easter and she said that we will see each other. and at first i thought that shes coming here :)
but im hopefully going to india at the end of this year. and i cant wait to see her, and then maybe next yr she'll come here :)
..but like i told vanessa before, im not really looking forward to not spending the christmas break with my friends coz when we go back to school, most of us will be at another school :(

and my aunty even told me, her dear dog boso, who she had for 7 years, he was her puppy..long story but my aunty had 3 dogs; susie, nelly and boso and well i'll try and explain..
nelly is boso's mum, and susie and bose had puppies together? idno something like that. and in 05 when i went down to india and stayed with my aunty, nelly was my favourite. but also when we went down there were over 13 puppies :) and omg.. my aunties dogs had so many litters of puppies, in 1 yr they had over 24 or something, they had lots alright? :L hahaha. and yea..i looked after them, and there was even this one that i called ice..coz he was isolated and he was the fattest one coz he was sadly the runt of the puppies and wasnt even in the cage where the pups stayed, so he was always with his mum susie (so he drank a lot more milk), or under the cage. and i felt sorry for this pup, made me cry, so i told my aunty that just coz he was the runt he shouldnt be treated differently, and that they needed to find him a good home :) naww, but my aunty cant look after all the pups so she gives them to the priests of belgom, the place she lives, coz they can afford to look after them and also the priests need company and stuff. some pups were so cute! :( aww i miss them.
anyways so boso died today, and when my aunty told me, she was like, my bestfriend. :'( that made me sad. coz how her kids (well step kids) always gave her a heard time and stuff..and i guess boso was jst always there for her? :(

rest in peace boso. 2003-2010. you were company to my aunty, when she needed a friend. i thank you for that, for what you have given her. she loves you so much, and you went through so much too. all the bad things that happened to you. boso you and jane were always there for eachother, human and animal but a true relationship of a best friend. and i thank you for that. <3

*sigh* i have a bad feeling about things that may happen to my mums family.. :(

ninoshka wants..

• her camera to be fixed :/
• to see my aunty soon..
• for my family to be more like a family and nothing less..
• to get good grades
• to stress less about everything
• to remember what it was to feel like nothing mattered
• at times to escape.
• ..to go on an exciting adventure
• a job..some mula --'
• to be able to go out with friends and not have a reason for it, gosh i jst wna have fun and spend time with them..hows that for a reason? :p
• to be like i used to be, more respective of my parents and swear less and not be so moody
• to be as happy as i always was. most of the time
• to be able to look past the little stuff that annoys me so much
• to be more grateful and appreciative of what i have
• to be myself, 24/7 without fear of what others think..mostly my family :(
• wishes to be reality..only at times of doubt and when necessary?
• ..a break :)
• a new bed
• to remodel my room
• not to share my room anymore with deandra..who i dnt mind as much when she doesnt piss me off
• a hair cut :L
• a sleepover
• to be less scared of things..
• not to have that same fear anymore.. :/
• to be more independent
• to know what i really want (to be able to make hard decisions on my own --')
• to have freedom (well at least a tad more than i have now?)
• not to want so much --'
• to remember what else i was gna say :L

and yes i know the difference between a need and want..hence why i called it 'ninoshka wants..' and not 'ninoshka needs..' even though i feel that i do need some of these things..